Absolutely Nothing

The words of Eckhart Tolle inspire me again today. I live in a word-soaked, thought-driven mind, which is the essence of madness. Like those people I see in public places that jabber aloud to themselves, as if carrying on a conversation with someone invisible. When in fact, no one is there. I’ve seen them at bus stops, or wandering the streets in downtown Portland, and when I do, I’ve been secretly grateful that I’m not insane. When in fact, I most certainly am. I may not be saying anything aloud, but, like most other “sane” folks on the planet, I carry on whole worlds of conversations inside my head.

According to Eckhart Tolle, until we become aware of the constant rampage of thoughts, blabbing away from within, we are not awakened. When, and if, we ever do realize our interior monologue, dialogue, idiotic rampage, can we free ourselves from it. Only then can we remove ourselves a step to watch it. Only then can we begin to cease our emotional knee-jerk response.

It’s worth reading the book, Power of Now, to learn how to begin to taste bits of freedom from our own insanity. Apparently, some people awaken suddenly and dramatically, perhaps from a horrific event or crisis. But for the majority, it is a subtle and gradual awakening. With an attendant subtle and gradual realization . . . . of moments. . . .of inexplicable peace, expansion and freedom.

This morning, I caught a few such moments. Gifts. I caught myself staring off into space. thinking of nothing. . . absolutely nothing at all. Then feeling as if my insides and outsides began oozing together into a sort of soft, feathery absence. Of tension. Of worry. Of thought.