VOID

It's good to be in Portland, but it seems surreal.
In many ways I can't believe I'm here.
Enjoying the kind hospitality of many friends who have provided me with a place to stay and who have invited me to outings for lunch or a visit.
At the same time that I'm moving through what seems to be an ordinary day. .
. . .rising. . .eating. . .going for a walk. . .doing various chores. . .helping out my hostesses. . shopping. .

I'm also floating above myself and watching with detached interest. . .
. . this new me that I seem to be. . .
. . single after 21 years of partnering. .
. .without anyone to massage or lay healing hands on. . having left all my clients once again. .
. .without a home. . .
. .without the faintest notion of where or how or what my future holds.. .

The VOID stares me in the face. .
gobbles me up. .
lays waste to all former notions I had of myself. .

This VOID into which I've jumped both feet. . .
Is where I'm floating at the moment. .
Unsure if I'll land
Or simply continue floating/falling/flying. .

Yes.
That's it. . .

I'm flying. . .